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What are some funny and smart quotes?

Last Updated: 18.06.2025 00:47

What are some funny and smart quotes?

“The human brain can only operate as fast as its slowest brain cells. Too much alcohol kills brain cells, especially the slower, weaker ones. So, regular consumption of beer eliminates the slower brain cells after you’ve had a few beers which will speed up your brain.”

They did a study between postal workers and chimpanze...

“There is no rule against postal workers dating women. It just works out that way.”

What explanations do flat earthers have for the shape of our planet? If they do not have any, why should their opinions on this topic be considered credible?

“A Freudian slip is when you say one thing when you’re really thinking about a mother.”

My sister Tracy sent me these a little while ago. I thought I’d share them. Thanks Trace.

Few people had funnier or smarter quotes than Cliff Clavin from the TV show, Cheers.

What do you think of the Black history lessons in the PBS documentary about jazz pianist-singer Hazel Scott?

“Everyone in the Swiss Army owns a Swiss Army knife. That’s why no one messes with Switzerland.”

“It’s a little known fact that pigs are the smartest animal. Scientists say that if pigs had thumbs and a language that they could be trained to do manual labor. They give you 20 to 30 years of loyal service and then at their retirement dinner, you can eat them.”

“It’s a little known fact that the tan became popular in the Bronze Age.”

Is it better for 2nd generation Western Muslims to marry someone from their parents' country or a western Muslim who was born and raised in the West?

“Ah just like all women. If they’re not turning down your proposal of marriage, they”re accusing you of suspicious behavior in the lingerie changing room.”